Wherefore Champagne?

Now, why must you consume large quantities of champagne and then suddenly decide that heavy pours of anejo tequila + an IPA would be a good idea? Why indeed. I have not felt this sick in a long time. Not in New York, not on New Year's Day. Coincidentally, probably not since I last drank large quantities of cheap champagne back while studying to be a paper pusher. I had to spend a good portion of a baby shower this morning (well...early afternoon, which is even sadder) hoping to god that I would not yak while the mom-to-be was opening her gifts. Now there's a new low, sister. My stomach seems to have settled down, but now I am trying desperately to draft a complaint and am seeing spots on the computer screen. Ugh. Help me.

Lesson for today: never, ever, ever combine champagne with other alcohol. If one must partake in the fun decadence that is champagne, one must never deviate from course. For the love of god. That is all.